September Slip into Fall
On Change, Enemies as Teachers, Synchronicities, and Painting
Happy autumn. I hope you had a powerful equinox. The leaves are turning in the Catskills. Almost immediately—and without verbalizing it to each other—Lauren and I are listening to gentler, quieter music. We’re reveling in sleeping with the windows open and cherishing these remaining 60 degree days. So begins my favorite months of the year.
And with this change in season also comes adjustment, uncertainty, anxiety, excitement, new opportunities, and even conflict. How do we deal with change?
A beloved community space in the neighborhood is closing and I feel like I barely had time to appreciate it. Never take anything for granted.
Kodi has been on edge because of an increase in the stray cat population in our neighborhood.
I’m navigating a tricky work-related relationship, which I touch on more below.
I’ve taken to playing A LOT of chess on the computer, a game I loved as a kid and have fallen into again as an adult (find me on chess.com, username LefawnBarnes).
After 3+ years of various injuries I’m facing the reality that my body can’t handle long distance running anymore. I was inspired by friends last weekend to consider biking. So I’m looking to buy my first bike since childhood.
Finally, my sister’s wedding is less than two weeks away and with it comes so many joyful emotions. I just put the finishing touches on my officiant speech.
A Look into My Painting Process
Water is has been a theme this summer—see Lauren’s upcoming newsletter for more. This piece is called Pool Party, 24”x20”. I began the piece with automatic drawing to make lines and shapes and generally let out some creative energy. It helps me get into a flow and relate more intimately to the work. From there I built up layers and textures of blue, black, and white with acrylic paint.
Fun is always a priority when I’m painting and very few things are more fun to me than putting ducks and geese in funny situations, like climbing ladders and balancing on circus balls. I used oil pastels to make loose and free marks and later turned some of these green ones into fish.
Recent Links I’ve enjoyed
List of People Who Have Gone Over Niagara Falls in a Barrel
Hundred Acre Wood Winnie The Pooh Nostalgia
The Definition of Swashbuckler Literature
A Story About Bandits Disguised as an Advice Column
Henry Miller on Friendship and the Relationship Between Creativity and Community
On Compassion, Sams, and Synchronicities
Through a chance meeting via friends of friends—in the very best ways social circles can work in both small and big cities throughout America— I found myself one Saturday evening on the first fall-feeling day of the season sitting around a wooden table with people I had only just met. This guy Peter had just arrived to the table and introduced himself before then telling a story about the philosophy and spiritual mystic, Gurdjieff, whose main teaching was “to be awake to whatever you are experiencing”.
In a very simple version of this story, Gurdjieff once had a group of students who lived together and practiced. One person in the community, I’ll call them “Sam”, was particularly difficult to get along with. They were contrarian, bad-tempered, and annoyed everyone else. (Maybe you know someone like this in your life? Can you think of someone recently who has caused you inconvenience? I sure can.) Anyways, this person was a real ass and the community tried to get rid of him. One day they were able to upset him enough that he packed up his things and drove away.
Upon hearing that Sam had left, Gurdjieff said “oh, no!” and jumped in his car and chased after them. Eventually Gurdjieff convinced Sam to come back.
Later on, one of the students asked Gurdjieff why he brought Sam back. Gurdjieff replied “I pay Sam to be here.”
I tell this story for two reasons. One is because I am dealing with a “Sam” in my life right now, someone who has been testing my patience, making me feel disrespected, and causing me a lot of anxiety over money. Maybe you are also dealing with a Sam, or have, or will eventually. Our “Sams” can be the best teachers for us.
Though our instinct is usually to get rid of them, to want to win, or overcome them, it is better to approach our Sams with compassion and understanding.
I try to remind myself that I can’t latch onto things that are out of my control, that the constant narrative chatter in my head involving this person does not help my situation. (I’m currently watching my beloved Wisconsin football team get absolutely pantsed by their division rivals and it’s a great test in not letting events out of my control ruin my day.)
Sams demand our patience, maturity, and our compassion. They demand we be a better person. When our back is up against a wall, what kind of person will we be?
The second reason I tell this story is because it involves a remarkable synchronicity, for only a few days prior to meeting Peter I had read this exact same story about Gurdjieff in the book Start Where You Are: A Guide to Compassionate Living (which I highly recommend to you).
What are the chances I would read this specific passage and only days later meet a stranger who would then quote it to me?
I love when synchronicities like this happen. It assures me that I’m on the right path. There’s really no better feeling than that.
Nature, the Greatest Healer
A few days in the woods is always a wonderful “reset” for my system. Kodi and I did an overnight backpacking trip recently and had a wonderful time. She’s come camping before but has never done a long day of hiking, overnight camping, and then more hiking. I can’t express how proud I am of her. She’s truly the best dog.
