How to Feel Hope FULL Not Hope Less
Compassion, Art, and Explaining America through the NFL
This past week or so I’ve gone through waves of feeling disappointed, hopeless, and angry: about the environment, about our information ecosystems, about morality and truth and goodness.
It’s natural for all of us to process our feelings, but it’s dangerous to let them stop us from living a happy and fulfilling life. It’s critically important to remember that we are not our feelings. Attitude is a choice. Your mood is a choice. We all have the ability to change how we feel.
Showing Compassion is More Important than Ever
Compassion is my word of the year in 2024. It’s defined as the wish to free others from suffering.
I learned compassion-based meditation back in the spring and have been practicing it frequently with great effect. In the Buddhist practice it is called Tonglen. Tong meaning “giving” and len meaning “receiving”. The essential idea behind Tonglen meditation is to breath in suffering and breath out love.
It’s a truly wild concept but it can change your life!
Below is a Cliff’s Notes version of the Tonglen that I practice (read this for more in depth explanation and instructions):
Find a place of comfort to practice. Take a few breaths to settle your mind. I like to scan my body starting from the top of my head and working slowly to my toes.
Next, extend gratitude from yourself to all living things. This means wishing goodness to all things and wishing that your practice today can benefit all. Try to feel this projecting from your heart out to the world.
Gradually bring to mind someone who is suffering—this can be a friend, co-worker, a media figure, a loved one. Literally anyone. Picture them vividly as if they are standing before you.
As you breath in, imagine you are taking in this person’s pain, anger, sadness. I like to visualize this as heavy dark smoke.
Breath out cool, white light of love, compassion, and healing energy.
I like to focus on one person for a while, like 10 minutes. You may move to several people in a session. Eventually you may work up to whole groups of people.
Conclude your meditation by extending gratitude to all living things.
After your session take note of how you feel. Perhaps record in a journal who you meditated for. If you can, check in on that person in the coming week!
Become the Change You Want to See
Things look bleak from a global level, but at a local level, we all have the ability to make an impact. Now is the time to focus on your immediate community. Your neighbors, your friends, the coffee shop your frequent.
I’m asking myself, how can I get involved? How can I help out? I’ve applied to four teaching/tutoring jobs in my area—and if you know of anything please send it my way!
I’ll continue to warn of the distracting and polarized nature of social media, especially in the aftermath of this election. This is your daily reminder that app companies profit off you being upset. It’s dangerous to doom scroll right now and I hope instead that you consider this:
The human heart
emits an electromagnetic field
that can be detected
from up to
five feet away
through a process called
cardio electric communication.
Are you connecting with enough human hearts on a daily basis?
Whatever you’re feeling is pretty normal. Consider that everyone you encounter might be feeling a bit like you too!
Upcoming Art and Events
Lauren and I will be selling art and quilts at Artport Kingston Artists & Makers Holiday Market on 12/7. Come through, say hi, and buy some presents!
I have a painting in a show here in Kingston and feeling mighty honored that it was used for the show poster. Show is up until 1/11.
Painting in show at Olive free Library from 11/16-1/4.
Tips for Living an Uncluttered Life
Screen free Sunday—something Lauren and I have started doing. I turn my phone off for most of the day.
Minimalist Phone App—I’ve had this app on my phone for almost a year. It dramatically reduces the addictive qualities of the device. I dare you to try it for a few days, see how you feel.
Clean Your Damn Home—A clean house = a clean mind.
No Screens in the Bedroom—It’s just like it sounds. I keep my phone out in the hall.
Explaining America Through the NFL
This is a quick thought I had the other day. I think a lot of us in liberal circles are still hung up on how people could possibly vote for such a terrible human. How could the majority of our country look past the rape allegations, the hush money payments, the lying, the indictments, etc.? I think an interesting comparison for our country right now is the NFL.
There are hundreds of podcasts, articles, and blog posts breaking down what the election means for our country. I like this podcast and this article.
The NFL is a trillion dollar industry rout with domestic violence, sexual assault allegations, and cheating scandals from the players to the front office to the owners. It’s a microcosm of the worst aspects of our society. A select group of incredibly white men own teams of majority minority players. But fans—and there is nothing more popular on television and streaming than the NFL—still tune in. The sport has only grown. It’s too big to fail. People are able to look past a player or coach’s transgressions as long as the team wins or the bet hits, or the fantasy squad score points. I think our tolerance of the ugly side of sports has desensitized us to the ugly side of politics.
If you’ve made it this far, extreme gratitude. Let me know and I’ll send some positive light your way.
Been thinking a lot about how social media agencies profit off of fear and sadness and how weird it is that we (artists) are expected to coexist with that fear-marketing.
Thank you Kevin❤️